Posts Tagged ‘random’

I’ve been spending a lot of time lately thinking about hipsters.  This is mainly due to the fact that an elementary school friend and I have been sending each other funny ‘hipster’ links back and forth… often featuring a shared  hatred toward the band Nickelback.  When I showed one of the aforementioned links to my brother and sister-in-law (the ones that call me ‘the modern day hippie’)… they failed to see the humor in the link and I was met with a few disturbed looks and the following line of questioning:

“What is a hipster, Sara?”

I replied, “Someone who wants to be cool by being uncool and NOT mainstream.”  I should have stopped there, but my word vomit continued: “Like an anti-establishment arty college kid that listens to weirdo music and dresses uncool.” 

 “So basically, like you?”

“Um… I’d say I’m more of a ‘wanna be hipster.’ I’m not a very brave dresser. [translation: cool/uncool dresser]… And I have a needy desire for constant approval and socialization.”

At this point, Peter starts to roll his eyes, and I realize that I’ve started to sound more like a cheerleader than a hipster.  My stomach turns… not from a disgust towards cheerleaders, but from a disgust for society’s labels making me feel like a two-headed psycho-hose-beast with split personality disorder… and for spending ANY amount of time contemplating my IMAGE at all.

I should change the name of my blog to: DOES EVERYONE FEEL LIKE THIS? subtitle: The dichotomy of my personality splitting my psyche in two on a daily basis for your reading and viewing pleasure.  Or maybe, NARCISSM! subtitle: Inordinate fascination with oneself. Or better yet, maybe I should spend much less of my ‘writing time’ thinking up weirdo FB status updates and/or writing self-involved blogs… and more time writing poetry and/or lyrics.

 Truth be told, I love obsessing.  I’m an obsessive, narcissistic, non-conformist self-deprecating Audiophile-Xenophile-Philomath [feel free to google/wiki/dictionary ap here]… with an insatiable compulsion to spazz out on stuff that I think is cool, and a need to incessantly talk about the BS internal conversations that I have with myself. 

Yes, I think hipsters are cool… even though, I’m certainly not ‘cool’ enough to be one.

the funnies:
Superhero Hipsters

Bullied by Hipsters

Coming Soon to MTV: Hipster Shore


The memories we’ve buried
Have just taken seed
When springtime comes
They’ll turn into weeds
And they’ll creep through your window
to smother your dreams

I love Elton John.  A LOT.  And I’m sort of mad that I’m actually in love with someone named Bernie Taupin who wrote ALL of my favorite Elton John songs.  I knew Elton John didn’t write his songs, that’s not the point.  The point is, TODAY, in reality, I hear what a stretch it is to believe Elton John singing in his magical voice about leaving society hounds to go back to the plough… or pirate smiled blue jeaned babies.

I’ll be optimistic here, and say that I do still believe in the cheesy 80’s movie endings… OMD playing If You Leave on a 7 minute loop until the Duck tells the girl of his dreams (you know, the one he has subsequently been stalking up to that point) that she should GO!! GO to the man of her dreams and not ruin the moment… with an omniscient view of how everything will turn out as the stars intended.  Yes, maybe Kristy Swanson making bedroom faces at him helped a little.  But we don’t get to see sweet nerdy Duckman’s happy ending, do we?!  You should have picked him John Hughes!!! ….er um, Molly Ringwald… er um, whatever your name was in that movie.  God, I’m such a sucker for movies with a record store… ANY movie with a record store.

I think most of my ‘after 30’ blog posts have, in large part, been about feeling old.  Coming to terms with not being a child, but still feeling like a child.  Growing up and realizing that I still want to believe all the bullshit I believed when I was that naive, under 30, dreamer.  I still live with my head in the clouds… my scatter-brained idiosyncrasies spilling out all over the floor when I trip over the responsibilities of being a functioning member of society. 

I don’t want to feel like the dream is dying.  I want to keep living in a childs eye of things.

When I was putting my boys to sleep last night, as we were listening to a Paul Simon song, they asked me what Hearts and Bones really meant.  I smiled with the pride of a mother who has two little boys that are actually interested in 1: Paul Simon and 2: Lyrics.  It’s amazing that I have more stimulating conversations about music with my babies than most other people. 

I thought about how to answer and I said, “Well… people say the heart is where all your emotions come from, and your bones hold up your body and help you to move along.  Without heart you wouldn’t be a whole person… no love, hope, or bravery.  You wouldn’t have much to move for, would you?” 

Lathan’s reply?

“And without heart you would die… because your body would have no blood.”

And that, my friends, is perspective. 🙂


Posted: January 3, 2011 in random
Tags: ,

Monotony – Wearisome uniformity or lack of variety, as in occupation or scenery.

So it’s a new year… not much has changed.  Same car, same house, same job, same groceries and laundry piles every week, same scheming back-stabbers and cranky regulars at work, same Saturday night FB posts that I hate myself for on Sunday mornings.  Does anyone else want to pull their hair out thinking of how tiresome the SAMENESS of life can be? 

Not that stability is a bad thing… more like the drone of Listzomania by Pheonix playing on the radio EVERY FREAKING TIME I TURN IT ON!  In general, not a bad song.  I even sort of liked it the first few times I heard it.  And then it was ground into my brain day after day, at which point I start to shut down… turn off my radio… and turn on the weirdest Talking Heads song I can think of.  Ho-hum.

Even that is repetitive!    IE: Sara gets mad a the world, shuts down, turns on Talking Heads… just as she has done a thousand times before.

In a memento mori kind of way, I wonder if any of this monotony is worth it?  I want to be like Office Space guy:

“I hate my job, and I don’t think I’m going to go anymore.”
<So you’re going to quit?>
“No, I’m just not going to go anymore.”

Of course, I would never just quit my job or stop doing the laundry… although, the man might disagree on the latter statement.  But there are so many times I just want to walk away from the tedious things in life.  I’m not lazy… I just don’t think they are IMPORTANT.  It’s the Talking Heads that keep me going.  The Lathans and Rileys… the mushroom chicken quesadillas, the weird looks I get from my husband and the rest of yas when I stop caring what others think about me and let my crazy flag fly, the walks through the park, the murals on the wall.

But alas, I am not doing any of that right now.  Those things may not even make up the majority of my week.  That’s when the daydreaming and slacking begins… when the longing becomes too much to endure. 

Don’t worry, I’ll be all happy and optimistic again tomorrow… which is also my modus operandi.

The Shinning

Posted: October 26, 2010 in halloween, nostalgia, random
Tags: , ,

Don’t you mean the S-H-I-N-I-N-G?
SHHH! Do you want to get us sued?!


Yin Yang

Posted: October 18, 2010 in modern-day Hippie, random
Tags: ,

Something terrible has happened; I’ve started second guessing myself, which I ultimately believe to be a sign of old age.

What happened to the confident punk kid, bred from hippie freaks? The girl that spoke without thinking, and didn’t regret it for a second? That acted insane and never really cared if she didn’t fit in with the norm? Was I naïve and uncaring of how my strong opinions (and language) would affect people? Or did I assume that my audience would appreciate my untamed (sometimes vulgar) honesty? And when did that free spirit become confined in the scared world of contrite, copasetic speech?

Having children has sped up the decline of my anti-establishment behavior… when every new conversation I have with a mom or teacher sends my brain scrambling for some sort of commonality to relate with them. More often than not, I find myself in the strange circumstance of having nothing to say. Yet, I can somehow spark up a 10 minute conversation with a tattooed stranger at the grocery store about the Black Keys.

I hate feeling alone and unconnected… although, I want to be different and unique. Does everyone feel like this? It’s like, at any moment, the dichotomy of my personality threatens to pull me in half. Do we all perform this balancing act within our own psyche? Which is harder? To live blindly by instincts, or driven to madness with second guesses?

Forget about the things you want…
Be thankful for what all you’ve got.
~Dan Auerbach

Recently, I’ve started taking Men’s One a Day vitamins. Not because I am indifferent to the lack of extra vitamin D for breast health, but because Peter refuses to take vitamins that his loving wife buys for his gout… and because I wonder how much of the 15 other One a Day series is actually just a marketing ploy. Have you ever thought about how many choices we have in any particular grocery store aisle? It disturbs me. We have ENTIRE aisles of vitamins, breads, tampons, and frozen dinners. And each brand is vying for our product lust via multi-million dollar ad campaigns and product placement… or in the case of vitamins, an onslaught of choices for every demographic (so as not to miss ANYONE.) Breast health, Men’s Active, Women’s Menopause, Kids, Kids Gummy. And don’t even get me started on the hydrogenated nightmare that is the new mainstay of our kitchen cabinets.

How much of our consumerism is mandatory? I am troubled that people think less about necessity and more about desire… and that big business is the one profiting from the brainwashing of America. I guess this has always been so in accordance to status. The more wealth you have the more lavish and desirable your lifestyle. When is it enough? Is the new American dream to have a speedboat, a mansion, a luxury vehicle, and a business conglomerate? What is going to happen to the simple joys of Middle-America? The freedom of not being controlled by the buck?

I stumbled upon this quote, and it pretty much sums up what I think is wrong with people who oppose my opinion:

Greed: A word commonly used by liberal, low achievers, anti-capitalists and society’s losers, to denigrate, shame and discredit those who have acquired superior job skills and decision-making capabilities… ~Neal Boortz

Am I lazy and irresponsible because I do not wish to feed the insatiable beast of big business? REALLY? What a terrible way to look at the world… that everyone less fortunate than you (less money hungry) must not be trying hard enough.