The First Rule of Facebook

Posted: July 11, 2009 in nostalgia

Once again I find myself at an impasse. Even while feeding an inhuman compulsion to be on Facebook via my IPod 24 hours a day, whenever I talk about Facebook in the ‘real world’ I always think of the line from Fight Club:
The first rule about Facebook is… you do not talk about Facebook. The second rule of Facebook is: you DO NOT talk about Facebook!

There are two reasons I try to abide by these rules. First, you have the social networking hold outs that will torment and pester you for being a weak, mindless drone in need of constant approval… which I’M NOT! Second, you have the naysayers that rant about you having a million fake ‘friends’ that exist for the sole purpose of adding to your million count friend quotient… which is FALSE. The latter is an interesting notion because… how many people do you know in the ‘real world’ that are just as equally full of BS as the online peeps that the social-networking-ranters are so damn scared of? Sure people on Facebook are out there shouting about who they are, what they are doing, where they are going, or where they want to go… but isn’t that the same crap that you try and come up with when you go Mano-e-Mano with someone in the ‘real world’? And isn’t it true that even in the ‘real world’ that can be mind numbingly annoying? Talking about BS to make conversation? Or venting about your bad mood with the hopes that your friend will make you laugh, or complaining about your fat ass to a confidant just to hear them tell you it’s not fat… it’s actually quite nice. And while I certainly strive on deeper connections, I am not so fastidious that I would try to escape the mandatory trite conversations that are the little realities of our lives.

My point is, if your a bad conversationalist in the ‘real world’ then you will probably be the idiot twittering about brushing your teeth on Facebook. If you’re an awesome conversationalist… and an all around cool chick, you won’t give a crap who tells you you’re a loser for having a Facebook, and you will try to make those two little sentences full of an entire conversation in a matter of mere words…

Now narcissistic word-vomit blogging? That’s a whole other ball of wax! 😉

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